Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 9:00 PM UTC

Monday, August 17, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Iowa Awaits Another Savior.
Original: Hegseth travels to Iowa in his ‘personal capacity’ amid 2028 speculation
Washington Post Politics 1h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Kim Praises Trump: Diplomacy's New Low.
Original: Trump says Kim Jong-un has responded to his overtures when asked about scaling back US drills with South Korea – live
The Guardian World 1h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Sports ★ 5 stories