Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 2:00 PM UTC

Monday, August 24, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

Wellness Hype Just Got an IPO.
Original: US nutrition startup Berry Street merges with India’s Healthify as GLP-1 trends upwards
TechCrunch 2h ago

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Iran Threat: Oil Yawns.
Original: Oil trades lower even as Bessent promises ‘economic D-Day’ announcement on Iran
MarketWatch 2h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

More Polite Crime, Naturally.
Original: ‘The Gentlemen’ Officially Renewed for Season 3 as First Season 2 Trailer Drops: ‘I’m Looking Forward to Pushing the Boundaries Further,’ Guy Ritchie Says (EXCLUSIVE)
Variety 2h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories