Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 6:00 PM UTC

Friday, August 14, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Charity Now a Tax?
Original: A plan to save Social Security involves wealthy people paying more — without getting an increase in benefits
MarketWatch 1h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Redemption Arc? He Was In Prequels.
Original: Ewan McGregor Would Like to Play Obi-Wan Kenobi Again — Even If His ‘Star Wars’ Prequels Were “Dragged Through the Mud”
Hollywood Reporter 1h ago
Capitalism Conjures More Witch Crap.
Original: ‘Practical Magic 2’ Inspires Wave of Witchy Merch, Including Gemstone Jewelry, Retro Tees and ‘Midnight Margaritas Club’ Aprons
Variety 1h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories