Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 6:00 PM UTC

Monday, June 29, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Lawyers Get Paid Either Way.
Original: Supreme Court won't revive Alan Dershowitz's $300 million suit against CNN
PBS NewsHour Politics 2h ago
Justice? More like a polite shrug.
Original: Supreme Court says Fed's Lisa Cook can keep her job for now, but it upholds other Trump firings
PBS NewsHour Politics 4h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Justice Delayed, Profits Ensured.
Original: Liberal supreme court justices condemn ‘destabilizing’ ruling that expands Trump’s power to fire regulators – live
The Guardian World 1h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

Monopoly Just Gets Greedier.
Original: Is the Comcast-NBCUniversal spinoff a precursor for M&A? Wall Street may already be betting on it.
MarketWatch 1h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Naturally.
Original: Trump Says Dept. of Interior Will Build World-Class Golf Course in D.C.
Rolling Stone 1h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories