Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 8:00 PM UTC

Sunday, May 24, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Democracy's a Gas.
Original: Turkish police force entry into CHP offices, fire tear gas and rubber bullets
PBS NewsHour Politics 1d ago
Gavel Bangs, Promises Break.
Original: Democrats vow a redistricting counterpunch but are facing hurdles Republicans don't
ABC News Politics 1d ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Democracy's a Riot.
Original: Turkish riot police storm opposition offices after leaders ousted
BBC World 1d ago

Business ★ 5 stories

Golden Years, Golden Fears.
Original: ‘My husband is leery of my plan’: We are both 60 and have $5 million. Is now a good time to dip into our savings?
MarketWatch 1d ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Peak Achievement: He Owns Your Ears Now.
Original: Drake Sets Album Charts Record as First Artist to Hold Top Three Positions With ‘Iceman,’ ‘Habibti’ and ‘Maid of Honour’
Variety 1d ago
Nepotism’s Got a New Face.
Original: The Man Behind ‘Mandalorian’: How Brendan Wayne Became Pedro Pascal’s Body Double and Channeled His Grandfather, John Wayne
Variety 1d ago

Sports ★ 5 stories