Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 11:00 PM UTC

Tuesday, May 12, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Priorities, Really.
Original: WATCH: 'I don't think about Americans' financial situation' when negotiating with Iran, Trump says
PBS NewsHour Politics 2h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Profits Plummet. Surprise.
Original: The real cost of the Iran war isn’t just higher prices — it’s market paralysis
MarketWatch 1h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Sports ★ 5 stories