Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 1:00 PM UTC

Friday, May 8, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Iran Flexes, Hormuz Shrugs.
Original: Middle East crisis live: Iranians ‘never bow to pressure’, says foreign minister after clashes in the strait of Hormuz
The Guardian World 4h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Potter Agents Thrilled About Corporate Storytelling.
Original: ‘Harry Potter’ Agency The Blair Partnership Signals Support for Paramount-WB Merger, Citing Studio’s ‘Long-Term Vision and Commitment to Exceptional Storytelling’ (EXCLUSIVE)
Variety 4h ago
Acting Pays, Apparently.
Original: Cannes: Sandra Hüller, Star of Competition Film ‘Fatherland,’ Will Guest on THR’s ‘Awards Chatter’ Pod Live From Palais
Hollywood Reporter 5h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories