Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 2:00 AM UTC

Friday, May 8, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Democracy's Still Got Jokes.
Original: Elections 2026 live: Labour suffers early losses as results begin to arrive in England
The Guardian World 3h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

War is Good For Business, Folks.
Original: Oil futures rise after U.S., Iran trade fire; stock futures quiet after court rejects Trump’s tariffs
MarketWatch 4h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Acting Scared Is Her Specialty.
Original: ‘Half Man’ Star Julie Cullen on Persuading Niall to Tell the Truth and Confronting Ruben’s Mum in That Awkward Dinner Scene: ‘I Was Honestly Scared of Her’
Variety 3h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories