Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 4:00 AM UTC

Thursday, May 7, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Gas Reserves Saved, Jewish Patients Not So Much.
Original: Australia news live: gas companies ordered to keep 20% of potential exports onshore; royal commission hears NSW health system ‘not safe’ for Jewish people
The Guardian World 1h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

Nature's Just Getting Started.
Original: Hantavirus outbreaks rarely happen. This Andes strain is ‘a complicated public-health situation.’
MarketWatch 2h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Fans Want Less Plot? Genius.
Original: ‘The Boys’ Creator Eric Kripke Fires Back at Fans Who Complain the Final Season Has Too Many ‘Filler Episodes’: ‘Are You Expecting a Huge Battle Scene Every Episode?’
Variety 1h ago
Marvel Bosses Fear Fun.
Original: ‘Avengers: Doomsday’ Director Joe Russo Says Spoilers Are ‘Over-Policed’: ‘People Are Anxious About Engaging With Anything’
Variety 1h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories