Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 8:00 PM UTC

Tuesday, October 20, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Two Lobbyists Forecast Doom.
Original: Karl Rove and David Axelrod give their predictions for 12 key midterm races
PBS NewsHour Politics 1h ago
$5,000? Bless Their Hearts.
Original: Gimmick or giveback? Even some Trump supporters don't expect to get $5,000 checks after midterms
PBS NewsHour Politics 5h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

AI Makes Medicine, Predictably.
Original: Wall Street researchers just used Claude to design a drug. The experiment has spawned a new investment thesis.
MarketWatch 1h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Sports ★ 5 stories