Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 6:00 PM UTC

Tuesday, October 20, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

$5,000? Bless Their Hearts.
Original: Gimmick or giveback? Even some Trump supporters don't expect to get $5,000 checks after midterms
PBS NewsHour Politics 3h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Gold Diggers Have Feelings Too.
Original: My partner of 17 years left me his $1 million home. His children say I influenced him to do so. Should I share my inheritance?
MarketWatch 1h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Agent Sees Layoffs as a Chance to Hustle.
Original: CAA’s Roeg Sutherland Says It’s Too Soon to Predict Fallout From Netflix Firings, Thinks Recent Mergers Represent ‘Opportunity’ for Industry
Variety 1h ago
AI Movie Prompts: Peak Creative Laziness.
Original: Taika Waititi Says It’s “Probably Inevitable” AI Will Be Used in Hollywood But It’s “Boring and Lame” to “Type in Prompts to Make a Movie”
Hollywood Reporter 1h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories