Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 6:00 PM UTC

Monday, October 19, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Voting's a privilege, apparently.
Original: Justice Department charges more than 2 dozen foreign nationals in California sweep targeting noncitizen voters
PBS NewsHour Politics 2h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

Progress: Reversed.
Original: People are using AI to make their smart TVs dumb again
TechCrunch 2h ago

World ★ 5 stories

Welcome to the American Dream, folks.
Original: Trump DoJ announces arrests of 28 green card holders in California on noncitizen voting related charges – live
The Guardian World 1h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Nature? He's Seen a Dealer.
Original: A$AP Rocky Discovers the Wonders of Nature in Trippy New ‘Shroom Clouds’ Video
Rolling Stone 1h ago
Art Pays. Shocking.
Original: European Film Producers Say Oscar Contender ‘La Bola Negra’ Shows Taking Big Risks Can Pay Off
Hollywood Reporter 1h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories