Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 9:00 PM UTC

Monday, October 12, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Ohio's Getting Interesting.
Original: PAC linked to GOP firm is boosting Ohio socialist in Senate race
Washington Post Politics 44m ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Empire Falls, Literally.
Original: Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs Hospitalized After Suffering Head Injury in Prison
Variety 22m ago
Meth Legacy Continues.
Original: R.J. Mitte, Walter White’s Son on ‘Breaking Bad,’ Dies at 34
Hollywood Reporter 26m ago
Authenticity? They Found a Museum.
Original: How ‘Ink’ Production Designers Recreated The Sun Newsroom Using Functional Linotype Machines, Working Rotary Phones and Old Typewriters
Variety 48m ago

Sports ★ 5 stories