Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 10:00 AM UTC

Thursday, September 17, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

They're Recruiting.
Original: The Trump Administration Sends a New Signal to Alien Disclosure Whistleblowers
Wired 1h ago

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Family Ties: Still a Scam.
Original: ‘I’m burned out’: I’m constantly helping my cousin who is running out of money. Is it too much to expect his sister to help?
MarketWatch 1h ago
Another Beige Thing To Buy Now.
Original: From Coffee Culture To Couture, Mizawe Brings A Lifestyle Brand Mindset To Everyday Luxury
Forbes Business 2h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Satan Gets a Sitcom: Now With Feelings.
Original: ‘Belzebubs’ Created by JP Ahonen Is a Relatable Story About Liberal Values Where ‘The Addams’ Family Meets ‘Modern Family’ – and Satanism (EXCLUSIVE)
Variety 1h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories