Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 5:00 PM UTC

Monday, June 22, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Table Scarred, Friendship Possibly Too.
Original: My houseguest left heat marks all over my table. I didn’t notice them until she was gone. Do I ask her to pay to remove them?
MarketWatch 2h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Material Girl Needs More Material.
Original: Madonna Says a ‘Falling Out’ With Universal Pictures Over Budget Killed Her Biopic Movie: ‘I’ve Had a Huge Life, So I Needed a Big Budget’
Variety 2h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories