Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 9:00 AM UTC

Monday, June 1, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Awards & Anger: Hollywood’s Peak.
Original: Jimmy Kimmel Thanks ‘Pumpkin McPornhumper’ Trump for His Peabody; ‘Andor’ Creator Tony Gilroy Urges Crowd to Take on Fascism Before It’s Too Late: ‘F— the Empire’
Variety 1h ago
Souls Broken, Film Probably Isn't.
Original: ‘All Night Wrong’ Director on His Hitchcock-Meets-Wilder Film With ‘Severance’s’ Zach Cherry and Maria Bakalova as Broken Souls
Hollywood Reporter 2h ago
Still Rocking, Still Dying.
Original: Mick Jagger Says He ‘Can’t Wait’ to Tour With the Rolling Stones Again
Rolling Stone 2h ago
Nostalgia's a Harsh Critic.
Original: John Oliver Roasts Trump’s Freedom 250 Concert: ‘People You Haven’t Thought About Since 2009’
Rolling Stone 2h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories