Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 12:00 PM UTC

Saturday, May 30, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Justice? They Brought Snacks.
Original: Week in Politics: Bondi testifies in Epstein case; DOJ's inquiry into E. Jean Carroll
NPR Politics 1d ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Business ★ 5 stories

Golden Years? More Like Golden Burden.
Original: ‘I have no preexisting conditions’: I’m 56, earn $198,000 and want to retire early. Can I afford private healthcare?
MarketWatch 1d ago
Pick Your Poison.
Original: Is VXUS Or VTI The Better Buy In An Uncertain Market?
Forbes Business 1d ago
Golf: The Only Ethical Networking.
Original: ‘It is such a fine line’: I am a CFP and see nothing wrong with networking on the golf course. Am I wrong?
MarketWatch 1d ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

Sports ★ 5 stories