Because the news cycle never sleeps, but we wish it would.

Edition · 7:00 PM UTC

Sunday, May 24, 2026

30 sarcastic headlines, curated by AI from the day's wire. Click any headline to read the original story at the source.

Politics ★ 5 stories

Democracy's Still On, Folks.
Original: Trump endorses candidate in Texas runoff primary, even as some ballots are cast
NPR Politics 7h ago
God Wants a Bailout.
Original: Religious leaders, lawmakers push for $1 billion to secure houses of worship
NPR Politics 8h ago

Tech ★ 5 stories

World ★ 5 stories

Photo Op in the Rubble.
Original: Zelenskyy speaks to Al Jazeera at site of major Russian attacks in Kyiv
Al Jazeera 1h ago

Business ★ 5 stories

$5 Million, Still Suspicious of Life
Original: ‘My husband is leery of my plan’: We are both 60 and have $5 million. Is now a good time to dip into our savings?
MarketWatch 1h ago

Entertainment ★ 5 stories

$1 Billion Space Game Still Not Leaving Earth.
Original: As ‘Star Citizen’ Hits $1 Billion in Lifetime Funding, Cloud Imperium Chiefs Reveal Fan Impact, ‘Squadron 42’ ‘Closing Stages’ Game Update (EXCLUSIVE)
Variety 3h ago

Sports ★ 5 stories